Who Runs The Household – The Husband Or The Wife?

Who Runs The Household? A wife says, she does.

I don’t think a man would ever completely agree to it, would he?

Being a man, the responsibility to earn for the family is upon his shoulders. Yes, a woman indeed supports with daily household management & sometimes with financial assistance too, but the credit to run the household must be given to him. Isn’t this the most vital part, to provide resources for the family?

What is a Household?

Before answering the question, let us first understand what a household means.

By definition, a house and its occupants regarded as a unit is called a household.

Further, “Running the household” is a comprehensive term that would include the physical, financial and emotional demands of sustaining a house and a family.

  • Physical
  • Financial
  • Emotional

You see, it consists of 3 equal parts, and these must be fulfilled by all the members of the family. By earning for the family, one can not overlook the other two aspects. And since the child(ren) can not earn, them being present on physical & emotional front maintains the balance. Similarly, a wife can not undermine the value of earning money to run the household.

Often times, efforts remain unnoticed, until not done.

Deepti Saini

Our Mentality

Often, we observe that:

  • One who earns less must do more household chores.
  • One who spends less time at work must do more household chores.
  • Tasks are defined into masculine (earning + outdoor) & feminine (home + everything else) and must be done by the respective gender.

And if a woman has a full-time job, then she tends to be at a greater risk of heart disease, cancer, arthritis, and diabetes than men who work full time. Because, essentially, she is managing two different jobs—the paying job and the household job.

Disturbing & eye-opening, wouldn’t you agree?

Who runs the household – the husband or the wife?

Take The Quiz

Take this quiz and find out who runs the household at your place. Give 1 mark for each ME, and ½ mark for both the partners.

  1. Who earns?
  2. Who takes care of the household needs, like groceries, fruits & vegetables?
  3. Who cooks for the family?
  4. Who takes care of cleaning the house? (mopping, dusting, bathroom, balcony, bedsheets, covers etc.)
  5. Who does the laundry?
  6. Who does the dishes?
  7. Who Manages Household Finances?
  8. Who tracks bill payments? (electricity, water, subscriptions, cooking gas etc.)
  9. Who is present for the child physically? (play, homework, dress up)
  10. Who is present for the child emotionally? (talk, listen, putting to sleep, answer questions)
  11. Who maintains Discipline in the house? (TV time, punctuality, hygiene)
  12. Who gets uninterrupted ‘Me’ time?

Your Result:

  • 12-7 ‘ME’: It’s high time you start sharing your household responsibilities.
  • 6 ‘ME’: Kudos to you. You are leading a perfectly balanced household!
  • 0-5 ‘ME’: Sorry! But you are putting an undue pressure on your partner.

The Solution

Who runs the household – the husband or the wife?
  • Awareness
  • Acknowledgement
  • Action

Awareness is talking to your partner, explaining things, possibly in a polite & holistic approach.

Acknowledging their efforts and your expectations.

Taking Action once you know the direction to start. Make a chore chart, designate task accordingly to all the family members, explain the children the new ways and mutually agree on rules.

Do you believe in & practice equal sharing of workload?

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